this is just perfect - just fabulous - because that means there are now 4 of us squeezed into a 2 bedroom house. My bedroom now looks like a Romanian flat share with a series of mattresses on the floor and me, Summer and part time dad squeezed in like sardines. Meanwhile my dad is keeping suicide at bay by re arranging my kitchen cupboards, shoe cupboard, cutlery draw - even my vibrators had been lined up into size order.
Summer is loving the situation - its another beating heart to destroy. She takes great pride in kicking a man when he is down '' you been kicked out? your soooooo old to be kicked out? will you die alone now then?''
While he is here I decide to make him useful, he can do the school run - that will teach him - we all know that Summer is at her finest on a cold dark winters school morning - how sprightly she springs out of bed, and is washed and dressed waiting eagerly by the door, ready and raring to go!
Summer did not disappoint - it took dad over an hour to get her dressed, he prepared her 3 different breakfast and finally off they set already 15mins late for school. Dad doesnt know where the school is, but I told him not to worry - you just head straight up the road and its on the left - Summer will show you the way.
Problem is you have to pass 2 other primary schools on the way. Summer knows this and used it to her advantage. Apparently she went all the way into the first schools playground and into the corridor before bursting out laughing and telling granddad she was just tricking him as they were chased out for trespassing by a caretaker, then he fell for it again at the second school! By the time they actually got to her school my dad was screaming at her to stop walking into random schools and to just tell him the name of her school. She refuses and stares at him with no emotion. Apparently it wasn't until he made the school secretary confirm that Summer was a pupil did he release her into their care.
They have been late every day of the week so far.
In other Summer news this morning Summer kicked up her usual fuss about being cruelly forced to go to school where she will be subjecting to such horrors as growing cress and finger painting!! - but this time she started crying and screaming that she did not want to go saying that she felt ill and doing this fake coughy gaggy thing. Seeing that my dad could not handle a full day alone with Summer I insisted she go much to her dislike '' I will get them to send me home anyway - I will say I am ill''
So when I got a call 2 hrs later I knew she was up to her old tricks '' Ohhhhh Summer is poorly, she doesn't look right, she is crying, we think she should go home!" can these people not see her for the devious mentalist she is?
I send Dad to get her - telling him to take his time - and ordering him not to show her any sympathy or fun.
I phone a bit later to make sure dad picked up the little faker on time - '' she threw up in your car - it was like a fountain of vomit - I am literally scooping her sick out of your ashtrays, its everywhere''
The first thing I ask '' Is my car all right?''
The little fucker knows how to prove a point